MT. CARMEL–Alex Jones, famous shock-jock and gun enthusiast responsible for popularizing Waco conspiracies, found his compound under siege after a brief, but violent, confrontation with local police. After recently claiming to own over 500 assault weapons on-air, police responding to a noise complaint decided to take extra precautions for their safety, kicking down Jones’ door with fully automatic assault weapons. Witnesses disagree about what happened, but both Jones and a police officer were grievously wounded in the exchange.
Jones, holding his many wives and children hostage, continues to broadcast the first of many revelations considering the true nature of the Illuminati, Bilderbergs, Bohemian Grove, Chemtrails, 9/11, and other folk tales which explain away the collective guilt of America.
Meanwhile, Jones has been accused of rape in Sweden, and Interpol has issued a red notice for his arrest. Jones has brought his many wives on air to talk about their perfectly happy sex lives, extolling the many holistic benefits of the kind and gentle touch of Alex Jones. “People, this smear campaign is just the beginning. This is Waco, this is 9/11, this is Ruby Ridge. Wake up, people!”
Nothing is sacred. Nobody is safe. Everything must go. Knowledge is free; it is the most valuable weapon a free people can have in the war against authority and hierarchy. I bloggregate from the miscellaneous battlefronts in this war. Unless we agree otherwise, I reserve the right to publish anything and everything you email me.
Injured tortoise given 3D printed shell
A tortoise has been given a 3D printed prosthetic shell to protect her own, as she suffers from a painful disease which has caused it to wear away. The Tele...